Best Weekend of the Year

Hands down. And why was this weekend so good, you ask? Well because I got to see my best friend in the entire world aka Zachary Ryan. I also got to watch him to what he does best. Play baseball.


So Saturday morning me and my family drove to Oklahoma City to watch Zach play at Rose State College. He played right field and it was really fun to get to watch him play. Then after that we drove to Bartlesville to watch the varsity game. We were barely going to make it there on time when we were literally two blocks away and our tire pops. It must have been something big that popped it because it went flat in less than a minute. So we had to take a little detour down this sketchy road to fix the tire. Who knew that changing a tire would be such a long process? My father was pretty pissed about the whole situation partly because of the expensive tire that was more than likely ruined. So me and Rae got out of the car and tried to help while my mom sat and ate her Sonic. My dad took this as an opportunity to teach us how to change a tire, even though he would not let us do anything besides hold the flashlight because we were to weak to do anything else. Once we finally got the tire changed, we were back on our way to Zachary's game.


We got there to find out that it was already the 5th inning. And then a few minutes later the game was over after only 7 innings. Thankfully we didn't miss Zach play because that would have been real sad. The game was over earlier than I thought and that made me excited because it meant that I got to hang out with Zachary sooner. After he showered, we all went out to eat at Buffalo Wild Wings and then went to hang out at the hotel. It was so good to see Zachary and get to hang out with him and be with him for a few hours. Hanging out with him makes me realize why I miss him so much when we're not together. Then when it comes time to leave, it gets really really hard to say goodbye.



Zach Hendrix...remember that name. You'll recognize it one day.



the flat tire

lookin good in that uniform



I miss you already.



and the worst part of leaving you is not knowing the next time that I will see you.

Day 18

The Person That You Wish You could Be
I'm about to get really real with you guys. This is gonna be deep. Get ready.
Dear person that I wish I could be,
I know that you live inside of me somewhere, youre just like too scared to ever come out. I wish that I could be a better Christian. I wish that I could learn to fully trust God and have complete faith in Him. This is really hard for me because I like to be in control all the time. I don't like crying because I cant control it. I dont like not knowing whats gonna happen because I like to be in control. I need to learn that I am not in control of my life. God is. He knows whats best for me and he knows what I am going to do before I even do it. I need to learn to trust him more. I also wish that I could be more godly. I want my actions to reflect the fact that I am a Christian. I want people to think positively of me. I want to honor God in a way that is pleasing to him, not a way that is pleasing to me. I want to learn to love everyone and not talk badly about others. One of my favorite verses that I recently heard my preacher say is:

"Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates his brother is still in the darkness." -1 John 2:9 

This verse is really powerful to me. How can we claim to be Christians, but still hate on other people? That is not what Jesus calls us to do. He calls us to love your neighbor like you love yourself. I really beleive that everyone is beautiful on the inside and I try my beset everyday to see it in everyone I meet. But sometimes I struggle with this and I make fun of people or put them down when I shouldnt.

Last night I went and saw this movie called "Beware of Christians". It was about four college guys that went around the world asking people about different topics concerning Chrisitanity. It was such a good movie and such an eye opener. It made me realize that there are so many people in this world who do not know Christ. We live in this little bubble of America where our Constitution and other documents are centered around scripture from the Bible. I live in an even bigger bubble at Texas CHRISTIAN University. I just assume that everyone around me knows Jesus and am so unaware that there are so many people in different countries who have no idea about Christ. The movie was so inspiring and it made me want to go all over the world and tell people about God. Maybe I will one of these days. I have always wanted too, but I am to afraid that my fear will overcome my determination in situations like that.

Another thing that I struggle with especially being a Christian is materialism. I want to have the nicest clothes, the coolest car, the newest phone, and the cutest shoes. I want more, more, more all the time. Our existence on this earth is not so that we can have all of these things. God gave us everthing that we own. Without him, we would have nothing. I think people get so wrapped up in the media and what everyone else has that they forget what is really important in life. I know that I have definitely gone through this alot. You want to have the nicest stuff to fit in. to be like everyone else. Well Christians were not born to fit it. We are called to stand out and stand up for Jesus. Another good verse that goes along with this is 1 John 2:15-17 which says: "Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever." Whoever does the will of God lives forever. Not whoever drives the fanciest car. Or whoever makes the most money. Whoever does the will of God lives forever. Wrap your mind around that.

The person that I wish to be is a better Christian. 

Day 17

Someone From Your Childhood
Dear someone from my childhood,
We have been best friends since I was in 3rd grade and you were in 4th. Our moms became best friends and so did our sisters so we did too. We got really close when I was in 4th grade because your mom was my teacher. Every Friday after school either I would go to your house, or you would come to mine and we would have a slumber party. At your house we would stick tape all over your room and then try and get through the maze without touching the tape. We played hide and seek with our sisters, climbed up the doorways, ate tons of lemons and pickles, and drank lots of root beer and cokes. We would always put stickers on our sisters' faces while they were sleeping. We were real pranksters. We would go up to your mom's classroom and play hide and seek throughout the school and push all the desks together to lay on them and watch movies. We took a dance class together. Which was a jazz class. That was quite an experience because I was not good at dancing at all.

When I moved up to be a big 5th grader, my mom took us to school and your dad picked us up. I remember he had the coolest Mustang that went so fast. When he accelerate I would always slam into the back of my seat. Your dad was so funny. It was around this time that your dad cheated on your mom and left yall and your parents got a divorce. I was so shocked and felt so bad for you and Meghan and Terrilin. Yall had just moved into a new house and your mom could not support yall with her teaching job. I tried to be a good friend and be there for you during this tough time but that summer I found out I was moving to the middle of nowhere.

After I moved we still kept in touch. We would send emails and would hang out in the summer. When you got a car you came to get me and we went and got snowcones and swam and hung out at your house. Now that we can both drive we can meet up and hang out easier. Being big college kids, we mostly just talk when we hang out now. Which is fine with me because we both love to talk and I love to hear your stories. You have grown into such a beautiful girl. You are so sweet and smart and funny. Thank you for helping me this past summer with the fear of going into college. You helped ease my concerns and made more excited and less scared. You also helped me make the transition into college since you had already done it the year before and know what its like. You are such an amazing person and  I love you so much Lauren Ashley Holz!

Because it's Valentine's Day.

Ahhhh Valentines Day. If you re dating someone, you love this day. If you re single, you hate it. And if you re a boy, then you hate it no matter what your relationship status is. I have mixed feelings about this holiday. While I think its great to buy your significant other a present and do something special for them, I often feel that it can be forced. Like its something you think that you have to do instead of something that you want to do. That's just not right. Here are my thoughts on this day of love. We'll start with the bad and end with the good.

The bad: I think that Valentines Day can get a little out of hand. People get all caught up in if they have someone to share it with or not, that they miss the meaning of it. I think this day is just to show other people how much you love and care for them. Whether it be your bestfriend, your parents, or siblings. The gift part also bothers me too. I do not like all the cliche valentines presents. The cheesy Hallmark cards, teddy bears, and boxes of chocolates can all collect dust in the store for all I care. I want to give and receive something meaningful on Valentines Day. Not something that says "I just went to Wal-mart and bought the first thing I saw, and many other people will also be getting the exact same thing as I gave you". No. If you are going to get your partner something you better make it meaningful. Even if its just a hand written letter or their favorite DVD. Giving someone something personalized tells them that you are thinking about them and truly love them, instead of just picking up something lame at the store. While we're on the subject of presents, lets talk flowers. Some girls love them, some girls hate them. I personally LOVE flowers. I think they are beautiful and I would not mind getting flowers every day for the rest of my life. Although my favorite flowers are colorful Gerber Daisies, on this holiday I love getting red roses. I think red roses have a special meaning behind them. They are a symbol of love. Maybe its just because they're red, or because they are so gorgeous. Either way, I love them.


Another bad thing about Valentines Day is I think it is a lot of pressure on guys to do something special. They are expected to plan some wild, crazy, romantic night or get expensive, elaborate gifts. I do not think this is what the holiday is all about. Guys should not feel forced to do any of these things. Couples should plan something special to do together and not make it such a big deal (in my opinion).


The good: I think Valentines Day is a good excuse for couples to do something special together that they may not otherwise have time to do. You can get all dressed up and go out to eat, or do something special and low key at home. The best Valentines Day I ever had was when my boyfriend made me my favorite dinner and served it to me on the dining room table complete with candles and everything. It was so cute and romantic and spontaneous and unexpected. I felt like he did it because he wanted too, bot because he thought he had too. It was also way more special than going out to eat because it was just the two of us.


I think this day is very important because it gives you a chance to tell your partner and friends how much they mean to you. This can be a very good thing especially if you are really busy and don't normally get the chance to spend some alone time with your partner. Valentines Day can be a special day like an anniversary is. Just don't exaggerate it too much.

Now don't get me wrong, i do like Valentine's day. I just think it can be a little overrated sometimes and really isn't all that it is hyped up to be. I'm just glad that I have someone special to share this silly day with. :)

Happy Valentines Day friends.

The lovely roses my sweet boyfriend sent me. Thanks buddy.

Attention ladies of TCU:

LEGGINGS ARE NOT PANTS! Notice how it is in all caps and there is an exclamation mark. I do not do that very often. Only when I feel very strongly about something. Obviously.

Cover up your butt. T-shirts are not long enough to only be worn with leggings. Put some shorts on. No one wants to see that. Plus it just looks tacky and is very unfashionable.

Let's be classy and wear pants, ok?

Here's an example.
Not a hot look my friend.

Just sayin.

Day 16

Someone That's Not in Your State/Country
Dear soeone that is not in my state,
I have known you since 1st grade. We were in Mrs. Tavarez's class together and became best friends. Now we are big college kids and you went off to the sin state: Oklahoma. And you attended the worst school. Oklahoma University. Gag me. Its okay that you went there because I still love you.


We had so much fun going through elementary school together. We were definitely big trouble makers. We pestered everybody at school and got in trouble numerous times. We talked too much in class and had to stand on the line at recess. We were rebels for sure. We may have been crazy, but we were pretty smart. We always drove my sister nuts and pushed my toy box in front of my door so that she could not come into my room. We liked to spy on the parents and play with my little remote controlled car. Camp Grady Spruce was like the best time ever because our moms were our sponsors and they let us do whatever we want. Our cabin was the coolest because we spent our quiet time (when we were supposed to be napping) planning how to prank the boys. We had bunks right next to each other and we wired the cd player up to your bunk so that we could control the music. We were not in the same class in 5th or 6th grade but we still hung out at my house. We hung out every summer after I moved to Ponder. When we get together it always feels as if nothing has changed. We are the same little mischevious kids that we were in elementary school. You are awesome and such a beautiful girl and I am so proud that we are best friends. Bailey George, come back to Texas. It's way better than Oklahoma.

Day 15

The Person You Miss the Most
Dear person I miss the most,
I never even knew it was possible to miss someone so much until we went off to college. I knew it was going to be hard, but I had no idea how hard it really was going to be. It was especially difficult to go from seeing you every day to maybe seeing you once a month. Being away from you is hard and I am not a fan of it. All I want to do when I have a bad day is to sit in your lap with your arms around me while you listen to me complain about anything and everything. You are the only person that listens to me when I complain. I miss just like hanging out with you and doing everything together. Every time I go somewhere, I wish that you were with me. I hate not experiencing new things with you. I always want you to be there with me. I feel like a piece of me is missing when we are apart. And when I am with you I feel complete, like everything is right in the world. I am happier when we are together. I miss being happy with you all the time.

Please come back to me soon because I miss my besfriend!

I miss you boyfriend.

Day 14

Someone You've Drifted Away From
Dear person I have drifted away from,
We were best friends ever since I moved to Ponder. You let me into your little group and we had soo much in common. We were both boy crazy, hated school, and loved writing notes. I have a whole drawer full of notes that we have written over the years. In 7-8th grade we were pretty much inseparable at school. We went to basketball games and dances and everything together. You knew how to make me laugh and always had my back. You listened to my boy problems and always gave me good advice.

We walked through the doors of school on our first day of freshman year togetherr. We were still really good friends all throughout that year. Then sophomore year came and something happened. We just started drifting apart. Maybe its because I spent alot of time with Zachary or because I started hanging out with other girls. Whatever it was, we started to drift away from each other to the point where talking just became awkward. It was weird. I didn't understand why things had changed between us so suddenly, but they did. The barely talking to each other thing lasted all the way until our senior year. I guess we both just got so busy with other things and other people that we didn't make time for each other.

You are a really great friend and when you came to visit me last semester it reminded me of how much fun we used to have. You are so pretty and are such an amazing person. You will be so successful in life because of your drive to push your self and succeed. I know you get really awkward saying I love you and hugging and stuff but I just want you to know that I will always be here for you if you ever need anything. You are an amazing girl and I miss you verry much. I love you Flake! :)

Day 13

Someone You Wish Could Forgive You
This is really hard because I don't know that there is anyone that I really wish would forgive me. But the first person that popped into my head probably still hates me even though I did nothing wrong. So ill just write about her. But its not like I care if she forgives me or not cause I didn't do anything to her. Here it goesss.
Dear person I wish would forgive me,
We were really good friends all throughout high school and then something happened senior year and everything changed. It wasn't like a huge fight or something that abruptly happened. It was a very slow gradual change where we just kinda drifted away. We didn't really talk anymore and everything that you said to me was very annoying. All you talked about was yourself. Your love life got in the way of your friendships and no matter how badly that boy treated you, you kept going back to him. Even after we all warned you. That's what got on my nerves the most.

So I started to distance myself from you and then things just got awkward. Then you did something that a best friend should never do to another friend and that's when things got real rocky. Me and the other girl sided together. It was us against you. And you had no one. Except your dumb boyfriend. You said and did a lot of mean things. You told told teachers that I was a bad person, you talked trash about me to everyone. I don't know what I did to you, but I just wish that you could forget about it. I don't necessarily need you to forgive me, I just want you to get over it.

Its nice being out of high school and not having to deal with your crap. That's all I have to say about that.

COSTA RICA

I desperately need to go here. I AM OBSESSED. This place looks so gorgeous with all the water and green trees. I want to stay in a little canopy resort and drink fruity drinks while I lay on the beach and watch the beautiful blue water or go exploring through all of the tropical trees. This place looks so pretty. I neeeed to go. Maybe for my honeymoon? Ahhh I wish.

Just look at pictures. You'll fall in love with it too.



I realllly want to zip line across the trees.


Hey, a girl can dream, right? ;)
I gotta do something while I am stuck inside on this snow day.



Day 12

I just wrote  a ton about this girl that caused me a lot of pain and just as I finished the typing the whole thing, it completely disappeared. So there is no way that I am going to retype that whole thing. It was stupid anyways, and its not even day 12 anymore. Its now day 13. So day 12 is being skipped.

So instead, I will just talk about my day. I went job hunting today and applied at American Eagle. I really want a job because I have a lot more free time this semester than I did last semester. Instead of spending my free time just doing nothing, I would rather spend my time making money. I also feel bad that TCU costs so freakin much, and I want to do my part to help my family out. I think having a job will be good for me since I have never worked before.

Tomorrow is a snow day. Whooo. No school. And its not even snowing outside yet. So ill definitely be relaxing and catching up on my tv shows. Yay for thatt!

Day 11

A Deceased Person You Wish You Could Talk To
Dear deceased person that I wish I could talk to,
I do not even know where to start. You have been living your new eternal life with God since October of 2004. That is 7 years. Wow there has been no way that it has been that long since I last saw you.

You were an amazing woman. You were one of the most beautiful older ladies I have ever seen. You loved baseball and going to Ranger games. You watched Wheel of Fortune everyday at 6 o clock. You were an awesome cook. I remember going to your house and my mouth would start salivating walking down the driveway because I could already smell the food. You made the BEST spaghetti. I think that is why I love spaghetti so much, although no one can make it like you did. You also made really yummy macaroni and cheese. Your food was soo good and I never left your house hungry. You always had lemons for me to eat and apples for Rae to eat. And you always had Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream and Orange Sherbert in your freezer. Mint Chocolate Chip is my favorite kind of ice cream. That may also be because of you.
I remember going to your house and spending the night. We would take walks all over the neighborhood and then we would go down to the Shell station and you would buy us candy. I loved playing outside with all the cats and in the wagon and on the swing set.

You are the sweetest person I have ever known. You were so kind and caring to everyone. Even if they didn't deserve it. Even though our family can get a little crazy, you never said curse words and you didn't like anyone else saying that stuff in your house. You were always cooking people food and doing everything you could to help others. You always told me that I could be whatever I wanted to. You made me believe in myself, because you believed in me first. You and I were really close. When I was younger, everyone would go to your house for lunch on Wednesday. I remember all of us trying to fit around that little table, eating our food. I loved going to your house and I loved spending time with you.

I wish that you could see me now. I know that you would be so proud. I wish I could just stop by your house and eat some spaghetti and talk with you. I also know that you would love my boyfriend. He's a baseball player, and I know how you love baseball players. I know that some day I will see you again. I cannot wait for that day to come. I miss you very much and I love you tons Grandmom.

P.S. Watch over my mom for me. I know that she still has a really hard time without you here. 

Day 10

Someone You Don't Talk to as Much as You'd Like
There are a lot of people that could fit in this category. I have many friends that I don't talk too as much as I would like too. But social networking sites make it easier to keep up with people even when you are not talking directly to the.
Dear someone I don't talk to as much as I would like too,
You and I have had quite a journey. From day one you have always been an important part of my life. I know that you are always there for me to help me with my problems and pick me up when I am feeling down. I don't talk to you as much as I should. That is something that I am really trying to work on. I know that I should ask you for help when things are going wrong instead of getting upset. I know that I should thank you more for all the wonderful things that I have in my life. I am so fortunate and blessed and sometimes I seem to forget that. I need to talk to you more so that you will know just how much you mean to me. You are the most important part of my life. I want to work on having a better relationship with you and talking to you more. Please help me to do that. You are amazing and mean everything to me. I love you God.

Day 9

Someone You Wish You Could Meet
There are a lot of people I wish I could meet. Channing Tatum, Jennifer Aniston, George W. Bush, Michael Buble, Reese Witherspoon, Katie Couric, Josh Hamilton, Snooki, Nicholas Sparks, and Taylor Swift. All of these people are idols that I look up to for many different reasons and I would love to have the chance to sit down and talk to any of them.

Channing Tatum is just plain hot. Jennifer Aniston is not so bad herself. Plus shes a good actress. George Bush would be very insightful to have a conversation with. Michael Buble has a voice that makes me melt. Reese Witherspoon is just so cute and talented. Katie Couric...I would not mind stealing her job. Josh Hamilton is an amazing baseball player as well as a man of great faith. Snooki is just hilarious. Nicholas Sparks has the ability to make me feel every single emotion in his books. Taylor Swift seems to follow me around and write songs about my life.

Meeting any one of these people would be such an honor. So there is no way that I could pick just one. And there is probably a lot more people that I would like to meet, but these are the first ones that came to mind. I always imagine what it would be like to live someone elses' life. Being able to meet any of these people would give me a little taste of what living their life would be like. I think that would be really cool.  

Day 8

Your Internet Friend
Okay so I am not even sure what an internet friend is. Whatever it is, I dont believe that I have one. Internet friend just sounds a little creepy to me. So I am thinking that I am just going to skip this day because I have no idea what to write. The rest of the days are all kinda a little weird too, but I will do my best to write something about them instead of skipping them like today.

So today is Friday. The fourth day that we have been out of school. I called my dad last night and told him to come pick me up and bring me home. I just could not be stuck there in my little tiny room with nothing to do. Now I am home enjoying fast internet, good food, and Dish Network. Oh and my family and little puppy Ginger.

It snowed a lot last night and today. Everything around my house is covered in snow. It is really pretty. The sun decided to come out today. I have not seen that sun in awhile. So thank you for that sun. It was really good to see you. It also helped melt the snow and ice a little but. Which is good too because I am ready for all this stuff to go away so I can feel like I am in Texas again. I would like to see the ground and be able to get out and go places. Me and my sister went out and played in the snow today. I took pictures but my camera cord is at school, so I will upload them laterr.

Hope your snow day(s) have been fun! Stay warmmm.

Day 7

Your Boyfriend
Dear boyfriend,
Where do I even start? We have been dating since freshman year. That's a pretty long time. Over the years we have become best friends. We have been through alot and have definitely had a few bumps along the road. But we always get through it and come out stronger in the end. You make me so happy. It is really hard being five freakin hours away from you. I miss driving 2 minutes down the road to see you. You have always been there for me. And I know that you always will. You are a great listener. I always have so much fun when I am with you. You make me laugh like no one else can with the silly little things that you do. You are the most amazing boy i have ever met. Thank you for supporting me and helping me get through the hard times in my life. I love the dumb little games that we play, how competitive we are with each other, and the Grandpa voice that you do. I love it when you tell me stories. Haha :) We have had sooo much fun together going on dates, Prom 2010, parasailing and snorkeling in Destin, drama class freshman year, One Tree Hill marathons, and so many more memories. You are seriously the best boyfriend any girl could ask for and I thank God that you are in my life. You are amazing BBF. I could say so much more about how wonderful you are, but I think I should stop there. You mean everything to me. I love you so much Zachary Ryan Hendrix.

Ti voglio bene!

Day 6

A Stranger
Dear stranger,
I met you today in the elevator of my dorm. You said hi and asked me how I was. We talked about the snow, canceled classes, and living in an all girls dorm. You were very nice to me. Your name was Jeremy. You were like the first boy at TCU to initiate and hold a full conversation with me. You gave me hope that not all the boys at TCU are immature, disgusting frat boys. Thank you for that Jeremy. You made my day like ten times better. Hope to see ya around, stranger.

SNOW DAY!

So today was the first day of February. Today was also the first day of the year that it snowed in Texas. Which means that everyone freaks out because us Texans' do not know how to drive in this stuff. Which means that school was CANCELED. Of course, TCU waits til the very last minute (4:49 a.m. to be exact) to announce that school will be closed due to inclement weather conditions. The great thing about being a big college kid is that we don't have to make up the snow days. Yayyyy!

I basically enjoyed the snow from the comfort of my warm room, because the cold bitter wind was waaay too much for me too handle. I caught up on all my tv shows and did a little reading. It was a very nice, relaxing day. The snow is nice because school got canceled, but I would rather it be 65 degrees any day. I am definitely a beach kinda girl. I only like sbow when I am in Colorado and have skis on my feet. Snow in Texas just can't compare.

Earlier today we got a text saying that school will be closed tomorrow also. I could hear all the girls in my dorm screaming as we all got the text at the same time. It was pretty hilarious. So that means I get to sleep in tomorrow and relax all over again. Hooraay! 

Snow makes everything prettier:

Day 5

Your Dreams
I'm not sure if this is talking about dreams you have in your sleep or dreams you have for your future, but I am just gonna talk about the dreams I have for my future.
Dear dreams,
You and I seem to be together alot. I am always thinking about you and what it is that I hope to accomplish in life. So far I have come up with some pretty good plans. Here's what I hope my future looks like: I want to graduate from TCU in the fall of 2013 with a Bachelor of Science degree in Psychology. Then I would like to start getting my Master's at another school. Hopefully that only takes one to two years so then I can start working as a Clinical Therapist. I want to work with mainly women and girls to help them overcome struggles that they have in their life such as eating disorders, abuse, depression, body image problems, and sexual abuse. When I have a steady job, I hope to get married to the man of my dreams soon. And then a few years after that, I want to have kids. I often wonder where I will live, what kind of car I will drive, what my house will look like, if my job will be all that I have hoped it would be...I dream a lot. And I know what I want. I just hope that someday all my dreams will come true.